I had one escape from reality
That used to be my dreams
To drift away to that subconscious world
 Where nothings what it seems

Lots of dreams I remember
 And some im pleased to forget
 Some of them were scary 
And some of em was wet

Then I caught insomnia
 And found I couldn’t sleep
 It were my doctor that suggested
I should take up counting sheep.

Well it seemed to work at first
Id nod off when Id counted a few
 But in my dream I fell in love
With this sexy little yew.

We would graze the grass together
 And do other sheep like pursuits
 And do disturbing things
involving Wellington boots.
 
so I decided to become a shepherd
Bought a dog a crook and a hat
 But walking the streets of Ipswich
I felt a proper prat.

My insomnia soon came back
I were scared to go to sleep
 I new as soon as I closed my eyes
 Id dream of bloody sheep.

Occasionally when Im awake
 I think of my sexy yew
 And I sometimes write er a love song
 When iv ad a few.

But I think Im quite cured now
My obsession has run its course
 I ad er again in my dream last night
 But this time with mint sauce.